My hands look small

Those of you that have been stricken with a bad cold, flu or scurvy (jk-it sounds so gross- what is that anyway? I remember it has something to do with oranges having too many or not enough) know that in order to bring yourself out of the depths of hell and back into the land of the of the productive, living, healthy population, you must first subject yourself to rest and that means being housebound.

From recent personal experience, I have to tell you that being stuck inside when the world is spinning without you there are stages that you go through:

First day- wow I have the house to myself, I felt a little run down but mostly (they come out at night mostly hee hee) it was my voice raspy and kind of sexy I sounded worse than I felt. I can watch The View, Dr Phil and Oprah without guilt from not multitasking (folding laundry, vaccuuming) while watching this daytime dribble. I sat back and enjoyed the entire day. I lived on hot tea and took a long hot bath, did my nails, pampered myself and pretty much let the house go to hell. My cats, Isabelle and Gucci were loving it having a companion with them as they are usually pretty lonely and I am not sure what they do during the day other than sleep. I thought to myself ok, I gave up a day I should be better tomorrow so I can get caught up on my duties then.

Second day- I felt worse than the first day. My throat was on fire and this strange sexy voice turned into a creepy monster hiss (see previous blog) Sick of the hot tea and very worried that my teeth would start to take on the color of my brown leather purse. Took more Tylenol and went back to bed, making my bedroom like a cave all the shades drawn, covers over my head, hiding from the world as it keeps spinning without me. Woke up sore after no work out for two days(this is getting serious folks- I usually workout every single day- my back feels like it belongs to an 80 year old) so I peel myself out of bed and head straight for the couch turn on the tv and back to Dr Phil however he is starting to look a little like Satan and then Oprah ---I dont even want to go there but she was really scary today. I force myself to get dressed and go to the club run for about 15 minutes on the treadmill and am ready to pass out (this is pathetic- I usually run 6 miles a day minimum) the only saving grace is ghe jacuzzi... ahhh ridiculously hot water bubbling all around me. I have decided to spend the rest of my life there.

Third day- no sleep all night I propped myself up with about 10 pillows so technically I am trying to sleep sitting up. More tv today- I have discovered the WE channel this is Womens Entertainment and O- the Oxygen channel- both run constant non stop watch until you want to poke your own eyes out Danielle Steele movies, one after another after another.... I watched for a few hours until I actually felt my Va-jay-jay begin to take over my entire body. I got so freaked out I went downstairs and found all the kick ass man movies I could get my hands on die hard, alien, godfather... ok I need to get out of this house. I go outside and sit out in the sun, my throat is burning so I have some cold iced tea this time. I fall asleep out in the sun and wake up an hour later sweaty and realizing I just got a quick dose of sun burn... Its a weird feeling to be cut off from others when you are sick. I force myself to go do a yoga practice in my yoga room. It feels good and I begin to feel a little more human.

Fourth day- I am good enough to try to teach a class considering two days previously I have absolutely no voice at all. The class went well, but I have lost my voice again. I head to the local urgent care and wait for about 3 hours for someone to tell me something I already know- I was really sick. I had strep. So you know what that means--- good drugs to soothe and relieve. My kindly doctor prescribed darvocet. Never dallied with that kind before but I have taken vicodin and this seemed pretty similar and I have to tell you it helped me to feel a little more human so I could actaully venture out to shop a little without fear of small children running from the scary sick monster woman. And shopping I did- then I treated myself to a walk around the lake and a smoothie. I even when for a long run later and ran 4 miles without fear of passing out- I am on the mend!

So I am back from the depths of hell (my own home) and back into the land of the living and am glad it kept spinning without me. One thing I learned is that whenever I am sick my hands look small- this is before the drugs...

To health and honoring that everyday- being grateful and happy that I dont have to watch WE everyday! My hands have returned to their normal size (stop laughing please) , my house still looks like hell and I dont care (ie. details)...and I no longer sound like Gollum--my precious......

cheers to your health and thank you domestic minx for thinking of me when your mouth hurts so much- my sister across the pond...much xxxx and happy thoughts-- kk